10 commandments for dating my teenage daughter

I behave differently—especially when it comes to boys who want to date my daughters. A very protective, almost primal attitude sets in, and I shift into warrior mode. I feel my lips wanting to curl back exposing my teeth as I set out to rip flesh off bones.

This shows you have discipline and can adjust your situations to honor a commitment. Aside from proper greetings and salutations, I want to see right actions.

But in my role as a father, I suppose a different thought process runs through my mind. Natural phase My two gorgeous daughters have been a joy in my life since they were born. From babies to toddlers, and then to little girls, I have watched them develop and grow. I have my preferences on what I expect from those souls who would (dare) date my daughters.

Perhaps my face changes expression when boys are around my girls in their co-ed schools. The hair on the back of my neck stands as my muscles tense and a fight response sets in. Herewith are 10 commandments for dating my teenage daughter: Thou shalt…

GRANVILLE, OH—Convening at their hometown bar to grab a drink and catch up on things, a group of old high school friends reportedly met up on Thursday as per their yearly tradition of saying the names of their former classmates. Or "Bag your leaves so they don't blow around in your neighbor's yard? It makes me wonder if this so-called lawmaker gave any thought to enforcement. You're going to have to get police in every child's bedroom all across the country, and we just don't have the manpower for that.

WASHINGTON—Saying the method yields positive results almost immediately, a coalition of leading therapists said Thursday that most of the personal issues people experience could be resolved if they would simply stop being so weird all the time. After all that jazz about God, the author just keeps on going: "Don't take the Lord's name in vain" is the next one. I'm beginning to think he's one of these church types. You mean well, but this law is strictly pie-in-the-sky.

Of course, it’s possible that she has me completely fooled, and that she’s out robbing banks while I’m at home writing stupid blog posts. Anyway, the result of my thinking is the following list of Thy Mom’s 10 Commandments.

Feel free to copy, revise as necessary, post on your refrigerator, and/or carve into stone tablets.

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